"Your rather fluent in sarcasm, aren't you"

I have an office in Christchurch. It sits among a number of law firms (sadly). Every morning about 10 'ish', I go to a local café and have my morning Cappuccino. The staff know me that well they have it ready for me when they see me enter.
A number of lawyers also frequent this same café (sadly). A few even come here to have a nosey read of this blog.
The other day I was waiting in line for my Cappuccino and I hear this voice behind me say, "Your rather fluent in sarcasm, aren't you". I turn to see this lawyer with the stupid goofy idiot grin on his face. Now normally, I would give my "they can't find a dead body at the bottom of the ocean" look. But instead I replied- rather bluntly- with "When God give's you a talent you use it".
For some strange reason this lawyer took this as a signal that I want to have a conversation with him!
So this time I promptly gave him my "they can't find a dead body at the bottom of the ocean" look, grabbed my cappuccino and left.

I need a t-shirt that say' If your lawyer, 5km radius please- your invading my personal space'.

THE FAMILY COURT GATHER FOR THEIR ANNUALLY 'ORGE' OOPS I MEAN CONFERENCE

I am really looking forward to this conference. It is always a fantastic laugh to listen to Judges and Lawyers spin their 'crap' in a social gathering. I also look forward to coming back afterwards and tearing it all apart!

In particular it will be interesting to hear Judge Laurence Ryan. The Principal family Court Judge who gets all 'warm and fuzzy' over abusing and alienating children. Proceeded to threaten the farther in our Dunedin case http://newzealandjudges.blogspot.com.au/2013/07/principal-family-court-judge-ryan.html
and has since gone on to THREATEN me, my FAMILY and my CHILDREN. You know, real mean don't pay for sex. I give Laurence three years in this role and either that 'gout' issue will get him or he will get sick and tired of me. Again- I am perplexed at how New Zealand makes it through a night when Judges are engaging in such immature behaviour.

Rumour has it, I am a topic of discussion. YEA! I just want to say how flattered I am. I personally do not want any of this to be all in vain. And I am now widely known amongst lawyers and Judges. I think it is important that Judges and Lawyers know, I go to bed at night with a very big grin on my face because somewhere a judge is 'shitting' himself over what dirty little secret they have that I have found out about.

I also think it is important for the Family law section to realise that this blog and others like it, is  rather tame considering. The reason Australian has a better Family Law system is because of such instances as this.
http://news.google.com/newspapers?nid=1300&dat=19870212&id=ShlVAAAAIBAJ&sjid=yJMDAAAAIBAJ&pg=5386,800435

http://au.news.yahoo.com/sunday-night/features/article/-/17866516/the-family-court-murders-Part1https/

In America this happens.
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/chi-0503010123mar01,0,4913954.story

I really don't think any Family court Judge or Lawyer has any grounds to moan about a blog. At least your all still alive.

Since I am fluent in sarcasm I don't want to waste it. Judge Emma Smith is speaking at the conference. I think this is a perfect example of the Family Law section trying to put on a 'front' and make out everything is alright within the Family Law of New Zealand.
BUT it is not all fairies and butterflies.
Why and who on earth would have Emma Smith the very judge who has brought the New Zealand family law into it's biggest ever event of public scrutiny in the 30 years as a speaker?

Idiots, that's who.

So I am siting here think what the heck is this women going to say? Well I guess it is easy. So here is my take on subtitles that Emma Smith would use in her speech (with a touch of sarcasm).


EMMA SMITH takes the floor (or bellows through the floor)

Introduction;
Wow you love me, you really love me.

1. How to support paedophiles.

2. How to engage in shenanigans and colluding with other lawyers.

3. How to turn a court room into an opera house.

4. How to belittle professionals in a court room to the point they refuse to ever give evidence again.

5. How to support a Paedophile part two. Including giving them children.

6. How to lie to your superiors and how to lie in an investigation into your actions.

7. How to ruin your reputation and drag your children along for the ride.

8. How to get yourself booted out of a court.

And her conclusion is......

I wish to announce I am relocating to Syria. I feel I have contributed all I can to supporting and nourishing paedophiles in New Zealand. Syria offers me the opportunity to extended my horizons
http://www.barenakedislam.com/2013/10/03/omg-obama-backed-fsa-jihadist-rebels-chain-up-little-girl-and-make-her-watch-them-execute-her-parents-because-they-were-shia/
I will be taking up the challenge of torturing even more children in a country that will fully support my endeavours. I have already offered my two daughters into an arranged marriage.

End.

At which point Judge Laurence Ryan will approach Emma Smith, hug and kiss her. Congratulating her on her new adventure. Stating she will be sadly missed and announcing he is taking over her role as president of the 'I love paedophiles club'.